It has been some time since I last wrote. I can’t really say what or why I stopped. Perhaps it was a lack of motivation, maybe I was busy, or maybe I was simply going through the motions of life. As we often say, “life be lifeing,” and that is true. Sometimes things come at us back to back, and before we recover from one thing, another thing happens. If I’m honest, I don’t know that I can use “life” as my excuse. Somewhere along the way, I lost my motivation and my focus.
A lot has happened since I moved across the country. The transition wasn’t what I expected. Living in a hotel for six months while carrying a mortgage back home and making considerably less money was difficult. There were questions, doubts, and moments when I wondered if I had made the right decision. Then came the biggest loss of all—losing my mom.
Learning how to navigate new spaces can be hard. The journey wasn’t unfolding the way I thought it would, and I found myself dealing with things I wasn’t prepared to face. So I did what many of us do—I packed it away, tucked it in the closet, and told myself I would deal with it later.
Purging can be difficult (at least for me). There are things we hold on to because they’re sentimental or useful, and then there’s the “red zone”—those things we know we need to let go of, but don’t. Clothes, shoes, seasonings (I can’t be the only one with duplicate or expired seasonings in the cabinet!). Instead of dealing with them, we tell ourselves we’ll need them one day.
Then there’s the opposite extreme. Sometimes we’re so overwhelmed that we throw everything out. And while letting go of things that no longer serve a purpose can be good, wisdom is found in taking the time to determine what needs to be kept and what needs to go.
Or, if you’re like me, you toss it all in the closet. If it’s out of sight, it doesn’t exist, right? So we keep stuffing things into closets and bins, opening them just enough to add a little more before quickly closing the door.
The problem is that eventually there’s no more room. What we’ve hidden comes crashing down around us and demands our attention. We can ignore it for a while, but ignoring it never makes it disappear. Eventually, we have to decide whether we’ll leave it lying there or begin the hard work of sorting through it.
That is where I find myself today. I’m starting fresh. I acknowledge that I messed up. I’m not going to dwell on the why or how—I’m simply admitting that it happened. Now, I must do things differently. More importantly, I must stop trying to do it in my own strength.
Second Corinthians 12:9-10 reminds us that Christ’s power is made perfect in our weakness. What a beautiful reminder that our weakest moments are often where God’s strength is most evident. I have spent far too much time relying on my own power, my own plans, and what I thought I could accomplish. Yet time and time again, I am reminded that I cannot do it on my own. But I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Perhaps you find yourself needing a fresh start—a reset. Maybe you’re trying to get from underneath the pile of overwhelm that has quietly accumulated over time. My encouragement to you is simple: stop trying to carry it all alone. Turn to God who is our strength. When we stop relying on ourselves and begin relying on Him, we make room for grace, for healing, and for new beginnings.
A fresh start isn’t pretending the mess never happened. It’s inviting God in and trusting Him to help us sort through what needs to stay, what needs to go, and where He is calling us next. It isn’t simply about starting over or doing better. It is about trusting God, abiding fully in Him.
Today, I am choosing to start fresh by trusting God, and abiding fully in Him. Perhaps it’s time for you to do the same.
Prayer:
Heavenly Father, I come humble acknowledging You as God. You are holy, worthy, and perfect. Father, forgive me for forgetting to include You in everything I do and say. Forgive me for trying to do it my way. I give You my concerns, places of overwhelm, my heart and my mind. I give You everything. Lord, I can do nothing without You. But in You and through You I can do all things, through Christ who strengthens me. Lord, as I move forward to a place of a fresh start, I put You first and foremost. I am seeking You for Your guidance and direction. I do not move in my strength, but acknowledge my weakness, and tap into Your strength. Thank You for loving me and caring for me. Thank You for Your open arms that receive me back. Thank You for Jesus and His blood that was shed for me. Because of His death, burial and resurrection, I can come to You. Thank You for the gift of the Holy Spirit who dwells in me. Thank You for a fresh start. I thank You for what You have done, and how You kept me, even when I strayed. I thank You for continuing to keep me. I thank You for what You will do in my life. I love You Lord. I honor You and praise You for there is none like You. I pray this prayer in Jesus Name. Amen
Abiding in His Presence 
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